Saying, “I Do”
One of the great joys of the pastorate is being invited to participate in weddings. Of course, like all pastors, I have my share of “wedding stories” —crazy family dynamics, brides in melt-down, dopey groomsmen, music mishaps, wardrobe malfunctions. I even had one person in the bridal party pass out during the vows—very distracting.
But, even so, weddings are terrific! Not simply the bountiful smiles, the general atmosphere of happiness, and the good food, I am very excited about the spiritual witness of the coming marriage. One of the primary analogies used in the Scriptures is to model our relationship with God as a marital union. What a marriage looks like between husband and wife is supposed to reflect the way that God loves us. The church is the bride of Christ. Turning from God is described as betraying marital vows—idolatry is adultery.
Given the importance of this analogy—that our marriages are supposed to look like our “marriage” to God—what marriages we see in the Bible should draw close attention, including the one detailed for us in Genesis 24.
Our culture has changed. The dating rituals and the process by which people fall in love and marry in contemporary society are far different than other eras. For sure, if the events described in Genesis 24 occurred in 21st Century America, we would deem it odd indeed. Isaac is a 40-year-old man, yet his ancient father, Abraham, arranges for a marriage, and even that appears to happen in a very random way. If parents suggested such a program to me for how they would get their child married, I would have absolutely no hesitation in seriously questioning their thinking.
So what can we possibly learn from such a story? Why is it included in the Bible? Is this a guide for Christians on how to find a spouse? And, what about those who are already married? Or, are not going to be married? Or, were married? What if this whole topic is not “on your radar?” Why has God given us this text as part of His Word?
Perhaps (as with the entirety of the Bible!), the message is not so much about me and us, as about God and His redemption. Perhaps this story is not a guide to our marriages so much as it is a guide to help explain God’s relationship with us. Perhaps the pursuit of the relationship, displayed in such a dramatic, if unfamiliar, manner is about God’s pursuit of us. And, suddenly, this text takes on new meaning.
As we prepare for worship this week, read Genesis 24.
1. Why is Abraham’s servant told to “put his hand under Abraham’s thigh?” It is clearly part of the swearing ritual (like shaking hands or swearing in blood). But, why do you think that is part of the ritual?
2. Why is it so important for Isaac not to take a wife from the Canaanites, but rather Abraham sends his servant all the way back to his people before he originally was called by God?
3. Why is it stressed that Isaac should not return to that land, but it was ok for the servant to go?
4. The servant puts out a “test” to find the right woman—whoever says certain words and acts in particular ways. Are these the kind of “tests” we should use to discern God’s will?
5. The servant’s dealings with Rebekah’s family certainly show respect, and most likely reflect the culture of the day, but may it mean more?
6. In verses 50-51, it sure appears that Rebekah’s family knows and listens to the Lord. Is there any other way to read this? Does this mean that there were believers far from Abraham’s family?
7. What does the initial interaction between Isaac and Rebekah tell us about their character? What is being communicated about God’s desires for us?
