Some Serious Family Dysfunction
I have not studied much psychology and am not a family counselor, but you don’t need to have much formal training to see the sibling dysfunction written all over the pages of Genesis—especially when we come to Jacob’s household. Now, that family was a mess! Favoritism, betrayal, hatred, jealousy, spite… Jacob’s family had it all.
Now, as so often in the book of Genesis, this is a blessing for us who live in the midst of the mess that is real, every day, down-to-earth life. The author of Genesis does not shy away from laying clearly before us the brokenness of the “star players” in the drama. The sinfulness, the selfishness, and the idolatry of the main characters throughout this story jump off the page: Abraham’s failures with his wife, Jacob’s betrayal of his brother, the rage and deceit of Jacob’s sons, the petty jealousy of his wives. As we read these stories, the actions of these men and women often confuse, frustrate, or annoy us—can’t we find a better story than this?
But for the honest readers among us, the ups and downs of the Genesis characters are often convicting, challenging, and comforting all at once. Why? Because it is all too easy to see ourselves in these stories.
The dysfunction that shows up so blatantly in Jacob’s family is not so dissimilar to the dysfunction in our own lives. One thing we learn as we grow up is that everyone’s family is flawed to some extent. The ideal, perfectly functional family simply doesn’t exist—outside the church OR inside it. Some families exhibit their defects more readily than others. For some, the decay is often hidden away. But, across the board we know that all families are broken, since all families are comprised of wounded, sinful people.
That Jacob’s domestic life was chaotic is easy to imagine. He couldn’t seem to keep himself from showing favoritism to one of his youngest sons, Joseph—and when you have a four wives and twelve children, showing flagrant preference to one is a sure way to stir up trouble. And Joseph couldn’t seem to keep himself from flaunting his status. His brothers, understandably annoyed, resort to harsh words, hatred and, eventually, to thoughts of murder.
And this pandemonium is not hard to predict. Indeed, Jacob’s family reflects a pattern known as generational chaos or, in theological terms, generational sin. Our bad habits, our sinfulness, are often learned from our parents. Victims of abuse sometimes grow up to be abusers themselves; aberrant patterns are often passed down from one generation to another. And we see this clearly in Genesis—Jacob’s mother favored him; his father, Isaac, clearly preferred Jacob’s brother, Esau. Jacob himself couldn’t keep his preference for Rachel over his other wives from adding to the chaos of his household.
How, in the midst of this family chaos, are we to hear these stories of Jacob’s children? Is it enough to feel comfort in the fact that others have dysfunction in their lives as well? Are we to glean simply that “everyone has troubles” and that’s all? My guess is that God has more in mind as we come to chapter 37 of Genesis. Certainly we will see the family troubles—it is the background for all that takes place. But, as always, what God has in store for us is to see more and more clearly the Gospel of Jesus Christ. And, that is why we have Genesis 37: because our salvation is described there. So, yes, we will see the distortion sin brings about in Jacob’s family. But, yes, yes, we will see salvation there as well!
As you prepare for worship this week, read Genesis 37:1-11.
1. It almost looks like verse 1 is filler—not really communicating anything important. But given Jacob’s character and past, what might be implied here with these words, that he is living in the land of his father?
2. Why did Jacob love Joseph so much? What might account for it in human terms?
3. What is significant about the robe of many colors? Why would this signify Jacob’s special love for his son? What would be a parallel idea today?
4. What is the point of the dream(s) Joseph had? What is being communicated here? Why is that important?
5. How should we understand the reaction of his brothers to Joseph and his dreams? Is this a good thing or not?
6. In what tone does Jacob speak to Joseph in verse 10? What is Jacob’s attitude and thought? How does that reveal his own understanding?
7. Verse 11 sets up a clear contrast between the way the
brothers respond to Joseph and Jacob’s “keeping this in mind.” What do you
think is intended here?
